And the kids went to bed.................

Remember those good Christmas times I mentioned in the last post... let me remember for a bit so I can see how things have improved because boy was today a BEAR!

T woke up this morning with a tummy ache. I figured the boy was probably hungry or that he just did NOT want to do his practicing. But then again, a stomach bug has been going around and good moms don't generally send things kids off to school when they might barf at any minute. So I had him eat and then had him stay home as the other kids left.

It turns out he was just fine. He also asked me if listening to church yesterday counted toward his 'reading minutes' for the class literacy competition. WHAT? I guess the person in charge said if someone was reading to you it could be counted. Sorry buddy. Church doesn't count.

Anyway... once he felt fine I took him to school.

Later that day, after S got home I took my two girls plus cute little neighbor girl to Walmart to buy more duct tape (I still had two bags left to finish up from the birthday party). I told the kids before we went in that, no I wasn't buying treats nor was I buying them lunch inside. But if they were good I would give them a piece of gum when we got back to the car. S started having problems immediately. She got her warning and then just wouldn't obey. Defiance was everywhere. Come on kid, I just want to buy some duct tape. I couldn't pass up some great clearance and got each of the girls (including little neighbor girl) and outfit. They were cute and in the right price range. But in the end, no one got gum. The funny thing was C knew it. While I was paying she was spinning the bag holder thing for the register behind us. I told her to stop and she didn't obey. So I told her to go sit on a bench. She says, "Now I don't get any gum." (sob sob) We got to the car and S asked for her gum. She knew she shouldn't get it but she thought she'd give it a try. More grouchiness...

Then home with more fits, stomping, storming off..... the list goes on. I made them lunch, let them eat, and then sent them to play.

During play time I tried to sort out details on my new phone. When I tried to order it some funky things happened and I wasn't sure it went through. So I called the CC company to verify and yes something did go through. Then there was that tiny (NOT) blizzard last week and that caused issues with their customer service and no one was available. So finally today I called... yep, order never went through and it was off my CC. The good news is now I have replace my order and everything went through as it should have. The bad news is I have to wait for my phone.

After school I made cookies for their snack. I hate to say it but it was easier than coming up with a healthy option other than apples (40 lbs on my counter). D was bummed he couldn't play with a friend from school (he's not quite catching on to the fact that far away friends are hard to have... when things get crazy this mom likes to say, "Okay, it's time to go home.") I did M's hair, finished her friend's duct tape bag and left for swim. I thought T's swim was at one location today and he informed me as we drove that I was wrong. Well, I only had so many options. I didn't have the info and I knew if he went to one location there would for sure be swimmers and if he went to his normal location there would only be swimmers if he was right. So I trusted myself knowing that he could always swim with the other half of the team.

I dropped him off and headed out to run an errand. When I arrived back I looked for him in his lane. There was no T. I looked in the other lanes.... still no T. I started panicking. Where was he. I ran down and had the pool mom ask his old coach if she had seen him. No siree. I ran to the front desk and asked the boy there check the locker room. My heart was pounding away. You know, little Mikelle we knew in Arizona is always on my mind at times like this and she was 11 when she was kidnapped and never returned. Then I turn around and see him dressed on a bench. Relief and then frustration continued. What the heck T? I guess when he saw that he wasn't supposed to be at that pool that day he just decided he wasn't supposed to swim. I told him to go and get dressed and head out there he had 20 minutes. I still wasn't angry at him. I mean, he's 8 and what would an 8 year old think? But I was frustrated. So he goes out there and they don't let him in his old lane. I thought maybe he was in trouble. When he was done I asked him what was up because he ended up swimming in the second lane for his just over 15 minutes of practice. I guess when we moved pools T had just passed into the next level up and it didn't get communicated to anyone. So he's in a faster group now :)

When we got home the kids started playing while I made dinner. When it was time to clean up, S got really mad and started being destructive. She dumped buckets, ruined other things people were doing. She pretty much just set herself out to be a tornado. Anyway,.... then she wouldn't help clean. And the deal is the basement needs to be cleaned before dinner. Instead she just kept being destructive. So I told her to go down and help clean or she was getting bread and milk for dinner. She didn't go help so I had DH bring her upstairs. I offered her this gigantic roll (I can't remember what kind it is but they are HUGE) and she just went bazerk and starting screaming and kicking. I said so nicely, "Do you want your roll." And what did I get but a defiant NO. So I took her to her room and held her until she could calm down. Then later I took the milk to her. She drank some and was done and went to bed. What do you do? I gave her a consequence before. Help clean or you get bread and milk. That isn't going to kill anyone. DH's dad told me that it was a regular meal when he was a kid. It's not like she didn't have oatmeal for breakfast, soup, apples, and a cookie for lunch and those cookies for snack... But then she refuses the bread. I'm not going to beg her to eat it. She knows I am not going to go back on what I said. It's key to our survival. We don't promise unless we can follow through because then they know we are trustworthy and won't lie. It's been the same way for years and she still thinks she can hit,slap, scratch, head butt, scream, and pinch her way out of it. Anyway... I took her milk after she calmed down. She didn't even want it all.

She's going to get it, right? Today I felt deflated. I just keep trying and trying and it seems that so often it's just because. It's the right thing to do I know. You keep working even when it's really hard. But it's tricky to work when the pay seems so far away. Anyway, I look forward to seeing if she's ready to be happy tomorrow. It'll be tested after school. She has one big mess to work on in the basement. I might be willing to help if she can control herself and not turn into another screaming tornado.

M had a bad day at school. Her class is in trouble frequently at school. I hate to say it but at her age, that is the norm. There are always rotten preteens. It just really hurts her to be in trouble as a group so much when she is generally a really awesome kid.

So tomorrow we try again. I have to work in S's class in the morning. It's a good thing to have to serve the one who is pushing your buttons. Sometimes there is a breakthrough when that happens. I'll do my best. I locked her stuff in her closet so I know she won't ruin it tonight and be so sad tomorrow. She can really be delightful at times. People are drawn to her. They really like her sense of humor and funny ideas.

And now I get to sleep. I have to prepare for tomorrow. I have some chia seeds that I am going to try to make pudding with. It might be horrible but at least it'll be healthy. ;)